Well, he'll probably pull away for a while to get his bearings. The bottom line is that he freaked because he just wasn't ready. So he freaks out when he runs into his feelings for you, and the first reaction he has is to want to separate from it. But is your experience wrong? No? Then don't pull away and reject his experience of himself. ( Remember: Men may see your emotional experience and pull away from it. Don't reject his masculinity or you'll always be disappointed. That's the seed of all disconnection in relationships that I've seen. Only that it's not an experience you relate to or share.īeware rejecting his way of being. Remember that an experience that is NOT yours does not mean that it is WRONG. It should be praised and celebrated! But we live in a world where a man's way of being is seen mostly as negative and hurtful. Now, I need to caution you that this doesn't make a man's experience Wrong in ANY way!Ī man's drive to connect with his energy and his work and his action is his connection to himself. We don't naturally embrace the emotional side of life. Guys don't spend a lot of their time in an emotional zone. Some guys do freak out a bit when they run into their own feelings and attraction for a woman. Why did he ghost you? Reason #2: Yeah, Super-freak. Some other woman might get ghosted out there so that you get HIM. Or maybe you enabled him in some way so that when another woman comes along, he can say YES to her - and NOT ghost her.Īnd before you feel jealous at the thought of some other woman getting him instead of you, consider this: Who knows, maybe he'll be back around later. So take a little bit of happiness in that you were likable, and for whatever reason (does it really matter?) he just couldn't be there for you right now.
He had his own reasons why he ghosted you.īecause HE might have a lot of life stuff, childhood stuff, dad stuff. And now he's not sure if he either deserves it, or if he knows what to do with it. Yes, it's totally possible - and likely - that he really liked the YOU that he saw.
It doesn't mean there was anything wrong with him or you.īut that feeling of his pulling away activates all kinds of crazy life-stuff and childhood-stuff and mom-stuff.īut let's get back to the good news - He liked you! This is often where the pain of him ghosting you overrides your compassion for where he is in life.
Sometimes a guy really likes you, but just doesn't know how to move it forward. Yeah, he maybe actually really LIKED you. This one is going to seem like a contradiction, but it can be eerily true. These are just some of the feelings that come up in a person when they feel the sting of being ghosted appear.
Rejected? Like he just screamed NO! at you and ran away? Even though he never knew anything about you to really "reject"?.Abandoned? Like someone just left you - even though you know he was never really THERE to begin with?.Scared? Like the rug is pulled out from under you?.When you feel the "ghosting" happen, do you feel: I'll also spare you the stories of college guys or anyone under the age of "responsible." We all know that the younger we are, the more likely we are to ghost someone in a discomfort around awkward social situations.īut before we jump into the answer to 'Can you tell me why he ghosted me?' - I'd like to take a second to look at what really comes up when you feel a guy pulling away from you in this way. I've also had PLENTY of times where she ghosted me. You know, one of those dates where we both didn't seem too into each other. I know he ghosted me - Was it something I said or did?įrom my own experience - being a guy who dated women - I tried to never leave any woman saying "He ghosted me." And even when it happened, it was mostly a mutual ghosting. It's especially confusing because he seemed to swing from really into you to the other extreme of ghosting you like this. Why did he disappear? Why did he just run away?" Especially because it feels like the rug just got pulled out from under you.Īnd then you're left wondering: " He Ghosted Me. The fact is that a guy can seem totally obsessed with you, and then - seemingly out of nowhere - he disappears and stops responding to texts or calls. No matter how short lived the relationship was. Which means that it's a harsh ending to something as lovely as a relationship. AND ignoring the former partner's attempts to reach out or communicate. Ghosting is breaking off a relationship (often an intimate relationship) by ending all communication with a person without any apparent warning or justification. Let's take a look at the definition of ghosting: